Refreshed

Unlike most people, I really enjoy a rainy day or two. It's refreshing to me. Feels like I'm someplace new and exciting. Like Seattle. My mind paints the mountains and ocean in the background. I travel new places daily this way and don't leave my carbon footprint. It's good for everyone. 

The grass is crayola green today. Flowers are blooming. Trees are blossoming. It's beautiful.My My spirit is refreshed. Reminds me of God's love and faithfulness. His mercies are new everyday. The trees are faithful to the hope that they will bud again. Nature is so obedient. I want to have that kind of faithful obedience. It's too easy to be distracted by all the 'things' the world throws at me. Pretty sure I have the attention span of an ant. 

At life group last night we were sharing times when we really felt God's presence through scripture. He is forever faithful and good. When I am rooted in the word God uses it to speak truth into my life and remind me He is all I need. I find clarity about questions I wrestle with and challenged to act. 

I've had some really amazing conversations with friends lately. How do we truly love? How do I know God is speaking to me? What am I supposed to be doing with the gifts He has given me? Where am I supposed to be? Am I too content? Restless? Selfish? (Yes.) Such great frustrations to talk about. It instills a holy rage in my heart.

What are you wrestling with? 

Aside: PTL! My peroneal tendon isn't torn, just strained. I don't need a boot. Just a brace. Doc said I can run the marathon :) Yay!

Fire-station field trip to parking ticket

Last week for life group we toured the fire station. It was awesome! Way cooler than when I was a kid. The equipment is so intense. If I was a fireman, firewoman, fireperson, whatever the politically correct term is, I would surely break something. I don't know what it is about buttons. They always tempt me. And the fire-truck had a plethora of buttons! 

Coolest thing ever - the jackets have thumb holes! One of my favorite things in the world!!! I'm a simple girl. Simple pleasures.

After our run this weekend I diagnosed myself with peroneal tendinitis on my right foot. It hurt after my run last week. Thought it was my shoes. I was wrong. I'm going to the orthopedic institute tomorrow to confirm my internet researched self diagnosis. The remedy: a boot. I have a marathon next Saturday. I want to cry.

I went to my first opera Saturday night. Loved it! The lead tenor and soprano gave me goose-bumps. The soprano had the richest voice I've ever heard. Everything about her was grand. Her voice, her presence, her costumes, her attitude, her character. It was an amazing experience.

Today I met a couple of friends for lunch at Mamas Latas downtown. Delicious! Great food, great company, great conversation. And, when I left I had a parking ticket. What?! Talk about an instant killer. I can appeal and go to a hearing or pay the fine - $15. I want to appeal. I parked between two vehicles and the one in front of me was gigantore so I had to back up a little to leave space for it to leave eventually. No good deed goes unpunished. Bad form parking meter nazi! 

Live and love

The ultimate goal of an actor is to lose themselves in the moment. That is the greatest success. However, in today's world do we actually ever live in the moment? Do we really take the time to appreciate what we are given now? 

For example, today is the most beautiful day of the week. It's supposed to hit 50 this afternoon! Tomorrow it's supposed to be another Spring Blizzard. I'm finding that's what we focus on instead of soaking up the blessings we've been given today. I am totally guilty of what I will refer to as, chronic unsatisfaction. 

How tragic it is that we all to often miss out on the beauty before us because we're ultimately fixed on the future. 

It's sad that we're so quick to grow-up. Jesus says that we are to have faith like a child. I look at this photo of my cousins from Christmas and am reminded of the honesty of children. There is no in-between emotion for them. They fully embody joy, pain, hurt, laughter, tears, adventure. They're curious and seek the truth. They aren't scared of rejection. They don't worry about tomorrow. They do what they want, appropriate or not. They fully love. I want to experience childhood again. I'm sick of the rules and regulations we have created for ourselves. The lies the world tells us of who we ought to be, how we ought to act, and what success is. I successfully fail at what the world expects of me. We weren't created for this world anyways. We were wonderfully made for so much more than this! I want to break off the chains of expectation and recklessly love.    

With Easter around the corner my heart is overwhelmed with how recklessly God loves a fool like me to send his only son to die for me. I am called to love Him and my neighbor with my whole heart, which I fail at every day. I choose myself over others all to often. Lord help me to forget about me. I'm not as important as I think I am. 

There is a video on youtube that brings me to tears every time I watch it. It's a father completing an iron man while he is pushing, pulling, carrying his son who has cerebral palsy. It's a reminder to me of the love a father has for his child. To think that God loves us even more moves me to share that love with others.

This weekend may not bring what we want. Shame on us for being so selfish. Take the time today to breath deeply, listen to the robins sing, and walk a little slower so you can enjoy the warmth of the sunshine and the kiss of a warm breeze. God took the time to create it for YOU! For once, live in the moment and be satisfied.

Live for today, yesterday is gone, and tomorrow may never come.